Thursday, October 19, 2006
They’ve learned and adapted…
Florida Boater Stabbed in Chest by Stingray Thu Oct. 19 (personal asides in italics)
LIGHTHOUSE POINT, Fla. - An 81-year-old man is in critical condition after a stingray flopped onto his boat and stung him, (i.e. Flew out of the water and tried to kill him and everyone else on the boat!) leaving a foot-long barb in his chest similar to the accident (Accident? Are these people blind? They've found our weak spot.) that killed "Crocodile Hunter" Steve Irwin.
"It was a freak accident," (Where’ve I heard this before?) said Lighthouse Point acting fire Chief David Donzella. "It's very odd that the thing jumped out of the water and stung him. We still can't believe it." (Believe it, bucko!)
Fatal stingray attacks like the one that killed Irwin last month at the Great Barrier Reef are rare (Not anymore.), marine experts say. (Experts, pfft, what do they know?) Rays reflexively deploy a sharp spine in their tails when frightened, (or thirsting for blood) but the venom coating the barb usually causes just a painful sting for humans. (Death is painful.)
James Bertakis of Lighthouse Point was on the water with his granddaughter and a friend Wednesday when a stingray flopped (or acted like it "flopped") onto the boat and stung Bertakis. The women (bravely) steered the boat to shore and called 911.
Doctors were able to remove the barb during surgeries Wednesday and Thursday by eventually pulling it through his heart (yikes!) and closing the wound, said Dr. Eugene Costantini at Broward General Medical Center.
He said Bertakis' case was different from Irwin's because the barb stayed in Bertakis' heart and was not pulled out. Videotape of Irwin's last moments shows him pulling the barb from his chest. (D’oh! Tell me again how he was this great expert?)
Bertakis was apparently trying to remove the three-foot-wide spotted eagle ray from the boat when he was stung (brutally stabbed), police Cmdr. Mike Oh said.
Ellen Pikitch, a professor of marine biology and fisheries at the University of Miami, who has been studying stingrays for decades, said they are generally docile.
Docile, schmaocile. How much warning do we need, people? The Stingrays are one the move. They’ve tasted the sweet sting of a human kill and they hunger for more. This time it was Bertalis’ boat, but who knows where the next attack will occur. It’s Orange Alert time people.
Don’t be surprised when Stingrays start showing up at your front door.
LIGHTHOUSE POINT, Fla. - An 81-year-old man is in critical condition after a stingray flopped onto his boat and stung him, (i.e. Flew out of the water and tried to kill him and everyone else on the boat!) leaving a foot-long barb in his chest similar to the accident (Accident? Are these people blind? They've found our weak spot.) that killed "Crocodile Hunter" Steve Irwin.
"It was a freak accident," (Where’ve I heard this before?) said Lighthouse Point acting fire Chief David Donzella. "It's very odd that the thing jumped out of the water and stung him. We still can't believe it." (Believe it, bucko!)
Fatal stingray attacks like the one that killed Irwin last month at the Great Barrier Reef are rare (Not anymore.), marine experts say. (Experts, pfft, what do they know?) Rays reflexively deploy a sharp spine in their tails when frightened, (or thirsting for blood) but the venom coating the barb usually causes just a painful sting for humans. (Death is painful.)
James Bertakis of Lighthouse Point was on the water with his granddaughter and a friend Wednesday when a stingray flopped (or acted like it "flopped") onto the boat and stung Bertakis. The women (bravely) steered the boat to shore and called 911.
Doctors were able to remove the barb during surgeries Wednesday and Thursday by eventually pulling it through his heart (yikes!) and closing the wound, said Dr. Eugene Costantini at Broward General Medical Center.
He said Bertakis' case was different from Irwin's because the barb stayed in Bertakis' heart and was not pulled out. Videotape of Irwin's last moments shows him pulling the barb from his chest. (D’oh! Tell me again how he was this great expert?)
Bertakis was apparently trying to remove the three-foot-wide spotted eagle ray from the boat when he was stung (brutally stabbed), police Cmdr. Mike Oh said.
Ellen Pikitch, a professor of marine biology and fisheries at the University of Miami, who has been studying stingrays for decades, said they are generally docile.
Docile, schmaocile. How much warning do we need, people? The Stingrays are one the move. They’ve tasted the sweet sting of a human kill and they hunger for more. This time it was Bertalis’ boat, but who knows where the next attack will occur. It’s Orange Alert time people.
Don’t be surprised when Stingrays start showing up at your front door.
Comments:
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Yeah, I hear they've started disguising themselves as Jehovah's Witnesses. *Ding Dong*- Hi would you like to hear the good news about our Lord Jesus Christ? No? *Bam!* Poison needle through the heart.
I find it interesting that you should use the word “fluke.”
As I’m sure you know a fluke is also a barb on the head of a harpoon or an arrow, or the barbed head itself.
Huh? StingRays (as you prefer it printed) have a barbed tail, do they not?
You’re one of them!!!! Trying to insinuate yourself with us with your casual fluke-talk only to later spring the barbed definition on us.
And it almost worked, too. But I’m on to you now, Sharpstick. Very clever pseudonym, but how about from now on we just use your real name, StingRay McKilly Fluketail.
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As I’m sure you know a fluke is also a barb on the head of a harpoon or an arrow, or the barbed head itself.
Huh? StingRays (as you prefer it printed) have a barbed tail, do they not?
You’re one of them!!!! Trying to insinuate yourself with us with your casual fluke-talk only to later spring the barbed definition on us.
And it almost worked, too. But I’m on to you now, Sharpstick. Very clever pseudonym, but how about from now on we just use your real name, StingRay McKilly Fluketail.
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